sniffle sniffle

Well.
I shouldn't have said anything about my health streak. It jinxed me. A virus has taken revenge. So bed and chicken noodle soup it is. Stupid sore throats.

I am currently watching a E! special on the shootings at the YWAM center in Arvada and at New Life. It's really weird to watch this and know that I drove by that church nearly every day. I watch these shows and it's always in some other town, far away. But this was in my backyard. It's just eerie to see the images of Colorado Springs. Something like that happened so close to where I live. Kinda pops my personal bubble.

Yesterday on my way back to my apartment I watched these kids whose family live on campus out in the parking lot washing all the students parked cars! What a pleasant surprise those owners will get when they see their new and sparkly car! I was tempted to go and park mine down there. :)

Times like these are when I want to be little again and have mom and dad take care of me. I know my mom and dad want to take care of me too. As my Grandma Martin always said: "It's hell to get old" I know she wasn't quite referring to the age of 20...but it was a whole lot easier at 10! I can't complain though, because I have caring roommates and friends and support from home, and I'm not really that sick. It's just easier in times like these for homesickness to creep in. (And watching all these clips from Colorado Springs on TV is probably not helping). How can I love two places so much? I think we should just push Utah, Idaho, Wyoming and anyone else out of the way and smushing Colorado right next to Seattle. That would be nice.

Well. I think it's nap time again.

Keep Moving Forward

After the events of last night, I woke up at the unpleasant hour of 8:00. So much for sleeping in. After tossing and turning until 8:30 I finally gave in admitting that I was now, wide awake. I went to take a shower and realized that the water was indeed brown.

That’s just gross. The last thing I need on a Saturday morning at 8:30am is brown water coming out of my faucet. Oh well, such is the life of a college student (and pardon the smell of those of us in the Wesleys…we refuse to shower in contaminated water…)

The sun came out to shine in full force and every citizen flocked to the city, parks, water anywhere the sun could see them. I hope this trend is here to stay, because I am pretty sure I am Vitamin D deficient and hopefully the euphoric madness will wear off and the sun won’t bring such a traffic jam.

I visited with family friends today at my church – it was such a coincidence that the State Chess Championship (I think that was the official title…) was held at the church I go to! I played Cade in a game of chess and did fairly well for being so rusty, but he indeed beat me. He’s so smart and I’m glad to see so many kids into this game (better than a video game tournament if you ask me). My dad would have a hay-day if he had attended! I remember him teaching me all the tricks and strategies when I was that age, and how every Friday morning I would go to school early for the Chess Club.

I watched Meet the Robinsons tonight. It is a crazy, crazy movie. Entertaining, but I felt like it was a little complicated for “G-rated” viewers! I feel like Disney, Back to the Future and H.P. and the Prisoner of Azkaban all collided and exploded into the Robinsons. Has some good overall lessons in it: don't let failure get you down, and keep moving forward.

"He went into the hills to pray. - Mark 6:46
What does Jesus do while we are in the storm? You'll love this. He prays for us...So where does that leave us? While Jesus is praying and we are in the storm, what are we to do? Simple. We do what the disciples did. We row...Much of life is spent rowing...Getting out of bed. Fixing lunched...More struggle than strut." --Max Lucado Everyday Blessings

You have to LEAVE!

Well.
This week has been full and exhausting, but I've finally reached the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm so excited for a weekend that isn't packed with homework.


Tonight was an unexpected adventure.
Christie and I were peacefully working on things with our doors shut and Brie and Ashley were busily cooking in the kitchen. Harmless right? Not in our apartment.

I hear a blood curdling scream (again, not that unusual). So, I pause my stuff to go investigate and suddenly there is mad knocking and banging on my and Christie doors with a frantic Ashley exclaiming "You have to leave!" so I rush into the kitchen where it and the living room is filled with smoke and the oven door is open with a pan inside with serious flames shooting out. My first thought was oh my goodness we are going to burn down the apartment. We flung open all the window's and Ashley screams "get water" and I start screaming "NOOOO!!!" while Brie stares at the flames continuing to scream. I'm screaming "GET FLOUR GET FLOUR," Brie frantically runs through the kitchen, Christie yells "USE BAKING SODA" Brie grabs the baking soda and proceeds to layer the kitchen in a dusting of baking soda, putting out the fire. The fire alarms screamed at us as we all fanned the smoke encouraging it out the window. Praise God the building is standing and no one was hurt.

So....moral of the story:
* when you broil something...keep the oven door open and only broil for a few minutes constantly checking (this is not this first time broiling has led to smoke...the flames were a new element)
* NEVER ever never use water to put out a kitchen fire NEVER! - use flour or baking soda.

So...we and our apartment smells like we decided to start a campfire and roast marshmallows.

Goodness.
What a night.

Mother Nature is alive!

So I've realized that the weather has consumed much of my thoughts and ravings for many of my previous posts. So...here is another one: it was a relatively beautiful day! I took some pictures because words can't describe the beautiful garden campus is turning into.

Magnolia Trees are quickly becoming my favorite - they are so beautiful and the big luscious blossoms just scream "LOVE ME!" The white one is right outside my apartment building and the pink one is on the way to upper campus.

These delightful pink flowers have such a strong and amazing aroma that it hits me like a sweet curtain from heaven every morning on my way to campus. This is seriously a "stop and smell the flowers" kind of flower.

The beautiful little white and pink ones are right outside my work and the bushes are just full of them. I love the freckles inside the petals.

This tree is outside Demaray hall and had to get in on the festivities...and the transformations happen, literally, overnight.

This was the best example of that, yesterday the huge trees in the loop were still sporting there scary winter skeletons and this morning about half of them burst into green canopies.

Along with the students that flocked to the grass for some much needed attention from the sun I spotted the campus ducks out for a stroll! They are so cute...couple of the year if you ask me.

"Flowers always make people better, happier and more helpful; they are sunshine, food, medicine for the soul." --Luther Burbank

Such is life.

April 21, 2008:
"Thomas said, "I will not believe it until I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were.' -John 20:25
Jesus...gave Thomas exactly what he requested. He extended his hands one more time. And was Thomas ever surprised. He did a double take, fell flat on his face, and cried, 'My Lord and my God!' (John 20:28). Jesus must have smiled. He knew he had a winner in Thomas...Legend has him hopping a freighter to India where they had to kill him to get him to quit talking about his...friend who came back from the dead." -Max Lucado Everyday Blessings

The weather has all but lost its mind and I've given up hope that the sunshine will ever warm this part of the earth again. It's so cold and yet all of my bones ache for warmth. The sun came out today, but I still had to bundle up like an Eskimo. My eyes didn't know how to behave because the sunshine was so bright and blinding - yet I was still so cold. Come on Seattle! I know you have a warm heart....replace it for this cold one.

I procrastinated a lot today. But, all the things I have left to do are the dregs of the coffee...I don't want to write filler essays and study for exams. So, today I did not. Which means that tomorrow is going to be a very long day. Monday thru Wednesday is always this great mountain I climb by my fingertips scrambling not to fall off. Oh how I would love not to scramble, not to dig in with my fingertips and pray that I somehow make it. I wish this was just a nice big walk in the flat circular park.

Such is life.

Hope your mountains are manageable. Oh! And I hope you celebrate Earth Day tomorrow with your fullest appreciation for mother nature and God's sweet creation (even if it is still snowing in April...)

There's no God like Jehovah! There's no God like Jehovah

Well, it is officially Monday. The wee hours of Monday....but same difference.

I should be sleeping because 7:30 comes so quickly and I always manage to master the look of zombie. Why are mornings so difficult? Probably because I sit here typing instead of sleeping.

But, these things are important.
I sang with Gospel Choir at Night of Worship tonight and it was by far the most powerful worship night I've ever attended. The talent and passion blew me away. We had the privilege to sing with such talented and beautiful voices that I know I wasn't the only one who felt the pure power of the Holy Spirit set that sanctuary of fire for the Lord. It was amazing. And something I'm not soon to forget - nor should I.

Today's devotion hits home...God has a way of answering prayers.
"What a wonderful God we have...who so wonderfully comforts and strengthens us. - 2 Corinthians 1:3 TLB
Encourage those who are struggling. Don't know what to say? Then open your Bible...To grief stricken: "God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" (Heb. 13:5 NIV). To the guilt ridden: 'There is now no condemnation for those are in Christ Jesus' (Roman 8:1 NIV)."
-- Max Lucado Everyday Blessings

I also ran across this:
"If I could sit down and talk with you in person about your life, I would tell you that if you have received the Lord, the answer to what you need is within you. That's because the Holy Spirit of God is within you, and He will lead you in all things. He will transform you and your circumstances beyond your wildest dreams if you will give up trying to do it on your own and let Him do it His way.
We all long for the closeness, the connection, the affirmation that we are good and desirable. But God is the only one who can give all that to you all of the time. Your deepest needs will only be met in an intimate relationship with Him. No one can ever know you as well or love you as much. That insatiable longing for more than you feel, the emptiness you want those closest to you to fill, is put there by God so that He can fill it."
--Stormie Omartian The Power of Prayer

Again, an answered prayer.

Words aren't doing justice to how I feel tonight, it is a fulfilment that I haven't known in a long time, a peace, a fire - there isn't a word. It simply is.

"I identified myself completely with him...I have been crucified with Christ. Galatians 2:19 The Message
For every cunning Caiaphas there was a daring Nicodemus. For every cynical Herod, there was a questioning Pilate...For every turncoat Judas there was a faithful John. There was something about the crucifixion that made every witness either step toward it or away from it...Two thousand years later the same is true...We can do what we want with the cross. We can examine its history. We can study its theology...Yet the one thing we can't do it walk away neutral." --Everyday Blessing Max Lucado

All day I have been glued to this screen trying to write papers until all of the life is sucked out through my fingertips. I can't think straight anymore and I only have one essay accomplished. How does this happen? I am itching inside to run around and scream and laugh and do anything but school work for a very long time but this chain and ball relationship with my laptop (and lack of roommates and friends this weekend) prohibits any of that. Bekah is gone with her family all weekend and my dear roommates will return tomorrow from a 7 day adventure in gymnastics land down in Louisiana. It's been good to have no distractions today - but I was hoping to have more accomplished.

During all my research reading and writing I ran across something worth noting:
"Spirituality, then is not worship, prayer, or meditation as distinct from ministry, politics or work. It is the way we wrestle with our buying and selling, working and playing, loving and fighting, voting and praying, ministering and being ministered to, integrating them all into a single response to who God is. Our prayers are no more or less a response to who God is than is our public policy. Spirituality is a matter of who I am, but never apart from what I do. It is being and doing in unison. And so, while "who I am" is never fully disclosed by "what I do," "what I do" is always incorporated into and is never separate from "who I am." --Compassionate Ministry by, Bryan P. Stone (emphasis mine)

I'm quite ready to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head hoping some supernatural phenomenon will occur and when I wake up everything will be finished. Maybe I'll just put in Harry Potter and continue to type my blood and soul into the wee hours of the morning.

I think mother nature forgot it was April...

Um. It's snowing.
And I happen to have a problem with that.
If I wanted to frolic in my parka and snow boots in the middle of April I would be home, oh wait - it's 70 at home. So, for the obnoxious snow cloud that insists on following me around the country, stop it.

These weeks are flying by. I sound like a broken record, but really, time is on this rampage to pass by at hyper speed. It passes so quickly that I don't even know what I've done with my life for the past week because quite honestly, I don't remember it was such a blur.

I had the privilege of hearing Tony Campolo speak at Group. He's am amazing speaker and captivated us with his audacious statements and challenges. He talked about the difference between power and authority. Jesus had all the power in the world, but he gave it all up to become a slave. That sacrifice gives Him the ultimate authority. We don't want to go through the sacrifice to get authority - we want to play the easy power games. Why give up power? Campolo said it is simply to express love because power and love cannot exist simultaneously. His ending phrase was "we don't need political influence, we need people talking with authority."

As he said, and as YoungLife says: Earn the right to be heard.

So much to take in everyday, causes, wars, underprivileged people, needs, hurts, abuse - it boggles my mind. I feel as if I'm standing awkwardly in a spotlight deciding how to spend my time, money, energy, prayers and if I can cover them all. I am frozen because I can't even fathom where to begin.
Where do you begin? I've also been learning about humility in my Leadership for Ministry course and its so hard not to go after a task without that little voice in the very back saying "whoo yeah wait for that sweet self-gratification, that recognition of how "humble" you are." I feel like I can't even be humble without being selfish.

On another note, I think I am going to try and post daily devotions here. Because a) I suck at staying accountable and reading them daily - and I want to stay with it and b) because they are good to hear

"When Moses reached out and took hold of the snake, it again became a stick in his hand. -Exodus 4:4
Just as Moses' hand touched the squirmy scales of the snake, it hardened. And Moses lifted up the rod...The same rod he would lift up to divide the water and guide two million people through a desert. The rod that would remind Moses that if God can make a stick become a snake, then become a stick again - then perhaps he can do something with stubborn hearts and a stiff-necked people. Perhaps he can do something with the common." -Everyday Blessings by, Max Lucado

As I write this lightning is flashing and thunder is booming and shaking the very foundation of this building and my insides. I love thunderstorms. Leave the snow behind, and bring on the thunderstorms. (But it's still snowing...and thundering and lightning...Seattle, you may have just trumped Colorado's insane weather patterns!)

hmmm...

I've been trying to write something here for a few days.
Everything I write seems silly, or I just don't like it and end up deleting it.
I don't know if it's because I feel like I am wasting my time because my to do list of a million things is staring at me and judging my lack of time management or if I'm just moody.

Well, I know I'm moody. Probably lack of sleep (and let me tell you...I adore sleep...and am used to having a lot of it...) so this is a rude awakening to my body, but altogether necessary because so much to do and so little time constitutes doing more during my regular "sleeping" hours. Somehow, the hour of 7:30am is beginning to grow on me and if the clouds would ever go away I might be able to enjoy some sunrises! (No bitterness toward the clouds or anything...but it's April and your time has come to say buh bye).

It has been six and a half months since I have been sick (frantically runs to knock on wood) which amazes me! I am sure that it is due to the absolute cleanliness of this apartment and our obsessive urge to Clorox everything frequently. The war against the germs...we are winning. In all actuality I think God has shown me mercy because I honestly don't know what I would do if I got sick. Everyone says they don't have time to be sick, but, no really - I do not have time to be sick, or indulge in other unnecessary things such as typing aimlessly away on a blog.
But a girls gotta process. And my boggled mind needs a moment.

I am nearly finished with my sophomore year. Yikes. That worries me because I'm not quite sure what I've done with my life for the last 2 years and its unsettling.

Well. It's "do something with my life" time.
Hope the sun comes out to play again. Real soon.